Monday, February 09, 2004

 
Dear Justin Timberlake,

You are the biggest Uncle Tom of all and sadly you have let me down in a way that can only brings me sadness. Oh, Poor little Justin.

You have shamed CBS, Janet Jackson, Janet Jackson's Breast, Stevie Wonder (you almost sound like him), The NFL, your fans, Brittany Spears, Brittany Murphy, Justin Timberlake. Oh wait you are Justin Timberlake. You're from Memphis right? I like your music. You and your cute suit last night, applogizing on the grammys. Did CBS beat you Justin? Did they threaten you and say you'd never work another Super Bowl? Did CBS accuse you of Rape? Not of Janet Jackson, but did they accuse you of raping the american public? You didn't mean any of this did you? I bet for a minute you kind of felt like Kobe Bryant. But Kobe Bryant has real problems. He's got Russian mobsters in El Segundo offering to kill his accuser. Are you thinking about paying someone to kill Janet Jackson for what she's done to you and your career? Probably not. Your a wimp like that. I still love you though. We still love you. I'm such a big fan. It must be tough being an election year and all. All the controversy. It must suck working for the music business. Imagine, a whole generation of children who can't imagine actually paying for music. The music biz really fucked themselves this time. How do you recover from that with out putting the fear of god into our ears? Have you considered another career Justin? I hear Nanotechnolgoy is really hot right now. It's the only thing those Venture Capitalist out on the west coast are chewing on right now. Interested? Maybe an MBA from Anderson Business School out in LA would do you some good. Keep me posted on what ever you decide. Hope the holidays otherwise went well. Sorry we couldn't talk last night at the Grammys..

Your always,

Christina Aguilera


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