Tuesday, June 07, 2005
Cash writes a letter to Channel 7 News
Dear Program Manager,
First off, I wanted to personally commend Channel 7 for the "Are the knock off designer hand bags you're buying on the street being used to fund terrorism?" piece that aired last week. As a now informed citizen, I have begun compiling a black list of over 100 possible hand bag suspects in the great Los Angeles County area. When I forward my completed list to the CIA in the next few weeks, I'll be sure to cc you on the memo.
Last night as a teaser to your 11 o'clock newscast, footage was shown of a pimped up 86 Honda civic running over the body of a human being. Most impressive was Channel 7's ability to provide surround sound quality to the victim's collar bone being smashed by the steel belted radial tires of the vehicle.
Now I know where you might think I'm going with this letter. Contrary to what you might think, I'm not here to inudate you with the typical, "What possible journalistic value do you provide your viewers by showing this horrific act?" Instead, I'd like to suggest to your station an exclusive regarding a similar act scheduled to take place tonight in El Segundo. I'm quite confident it will boost ratings nothing short of the Phil Spector coverage your station aired last year.
In short, the incident will have all the gory footage of the Honda Civic incident, but in addition will shed light on possible corruption surrounding the mayoral race here in LA. If a reporter can meet me behind the bowling alley off the 105 in El Segundo at 10:30 tonight, you'll have your gruesome story.
Look forward to hearing from you...
Cash Frock
First off, I wanted to personally commend Channel 7 for the "Are the knock off designer hand bags you're buying on the street being used to fund terrorism?" piece that aired last week. As a now informed citizen, I have begun compiling a black list of over 100 possible hand bag suspects in the great Los Angeles County area. When I forward my completed list to the CIA in the next few weeks, I'll be sure to cc you on the memo.
Last night as a teaser to your 11 o'clock newscast, footage was shown of a pimped up 86 Honda civic running over the body of a human being. Most impressive was Channel 7's ability to provide surround sound quality to the victim's collar bone being smashed by the steel belted radial tires of the vehicle.
Now I know where you might think I'm going with this letter. Contrary to what you might think, I'm not here to inudate you with the typical, "What possible journalistic value do you provide your viewers by showing this horrific act?" Instead, I'd like to suggest to your station an exclusive regarding a similar act scheduled to take place tonight in El Segundo. I'm quite confident it will boost ratings nothing short of the Phil Spector coverage your station aired last year.
In short, the incident will have all the gory footage of the Honda Civic incident, but in addition will shed light on possible corruption surrounding the mayoral race here in LA. If a reporter can meet me behind the bowling alley off the 105 in El Segundo at 10:30 tonight, you'll have your gruesome story.
Look forward to hearing from you...
Cash Frock
# posted by DH @ 6:17 AM 
Comments:
<< Home
Cash
You should contact Honda and pitch them a string of commercials touting the Civic's ability to cut through collarbones like a hot knife through soy margarine.
-- Pall Bloo
Post a Comment
You should contact Honda and pitch them a string of commercials touting the Civic's ability to cut through collarbones like a hot knife through soy margarine.
-- Pall Bloo
# posted by 
: 11:30 AM
: 11:30 AM << Home
